Would you shush your best friend the way you shush your crying baby?
If we treated our friends the way we treat an upset baby… they wouldn’t stick around for long.
Why do we say, “I’m here for you” to a crying friend, but shush a crying baby?
As adults we often encourage each other to express and ‘let out’ negative or difficult emotions,
recognising the relief that comes from ‘a good cry’ and the harm that bottling it all up can do.
However, when it comes to babies we often take the opposite approach. New parents, tired
parents, busy parents and well-meaning friends and family often do whatever they can to stop a
baby crying as quickly as possible.
WHY do we want to stop a crying baby?
– We assume that crying is a bad thing – that something is very wrong
– Crying can be difficult to hear, especially if we’re tired or stressed
– If we’re not tuned in to our baby it can be hard to recognise why they are crying, so we
assume it’s something that needs to be fixed
– If they’re crying they aren’t sleeping!
DOWNSIDES to stopping a crying baby
– We provide intervention the baby doesn’t want or need – like extra feeds
– We don’t allow the baby time to learn or self soothe
– It can be tiring and frustrating for parents trying to ‘fix’ things when that’s not what your baby needs
DO INSTEAD for better sleep solutions for babies
– Recognise that crying has many purposes – don’t assume your baby is desperately
unhappy and needs to be ‘fixed’
Next time you feel like you’re going crazy because you don’t know why you have a crying baby & frustrated that your baby isn’t asleep in 5 minutes, stop . Pretend this is your friend. What would you do ?
It may take some time but you’ll soon feel feel clear on when you need to do, enjoy motherhood and just know what to do.
Crying baby for no reason? Not in your house.
LEt me know how you go just being with your baby below in the comment section or over on our facebook page
Ps Remember I can help with all this and make it better for both of you- Here’s how